Childhood Sociopath

Back when we used to gather after school

And shoot some hoops or even pool

And you let me wear your hoodie

Cause even though we were ‘Just friends’

Everyone would know to keep their hands off

Because back then we were everything and nothing

And I think I told you no so many times, you knew I was bluffing

You always swore you’d wait until one day I’d break

But it seems my ability to outlast and outstay you

Really kept me the winner

That line is getting thinner

Back when we used to walk in the frost

And you’d take some perverse joy in the mere thought

That you could crush my frozen fingers with yours

And pretend that the pain was for a greater cause

Because back then we were everything and nothing

And I told you to fuck off far too fucking often

But you always swore you’d wait until one day I’d break

But you never really counted on a silly thing like fate

It kept me the winner

That line’s been getting thinner

Back when I wrangled the truth from you

In choked out sobs

Because my childish cruelty could never get enough

Not enough of you and being drunk on my power

And how I could still hurt you after your love turned sour

Because back then we were still everything and nothing

And I go back there in my mind ever so often

Just to visit that place

Of a comfy status quo

Just to find out what I already know

I will never be able to do as you

There’s one thing I love

And my ego gets bruised

So I set you on fire

And I played with the flames.

Whenever you fight back

It just means I win.

Nofish

If I were a onefish,
it wouldn't be so bad,
to swim along alone
on the paths the twofish tread.

If I were a twofish,
I'm sure that I could find-
another kindred twofish
to share the same mind.

But no, you'll never find me
treading the same ponds,
swimming in the waters
of which twofish are so fond.

And you won't see me splashing
around in the same lakes
where onefish live so happily
despite their lack of mates.

Instead you'll find me dreaming
up on their grassy banks,
on every ivory coast,
near the oceans- on the lands.

You'll find me watching gladly
as all the fish swim by.
You'll find me being thankful
for the way I lead my life.

For twofish may be happy-
and onefish may be glad,
but being' nofish at all
is the best life ever had.

Trinkets for your thinking

For every stupid thing I've said
You have a dime that's worse for wear
You claim the thoughts inside my head
And pull them out into the air

As if a single golden coin
Could be the thing that makes this right
Yeah, to the victor go the spoils
And all my words can spoil the night

They stain my lips, they stain the air
And mark the atmosphere you breathe
They taint the ground on which you walk
Yeah, they can soil your precious streets

You'll never pay me for discretion
You'll never bribe away the truth
I'm so far gone beyond retention
Your efforts are a point that's moot

A dam is loose, a seal is broke
There's nothing now that you could do
No lengths that you could ever go to
That wouldn't perish in the smoke

The Truth will out, the Truth will go
Wherever Truth sees fit to be
And though it have no other place
This Truth will have a place in me

*Dimes are not gold- this is besides the point.

Broken Branches

Hold on to the illusion

that one day it will get better,

Hold on to it because you know

the alternative is bitter

And it’s quicker

To fight with a smile on your face

Instead of counting

the time that you waste

We had some words

Yeah, and we always came apart

I never found my way back to the start

And I can tell

You never really adjusted well

In this purgatory or hell,

you know...the place you dwell

You’re in limbo in my mind

And I’m stuck in the rewind

Wrote it so many times –

if only I could find

Just a way-just a sentinel,

some road to follow

I would beg, I would borrow,

I would give away tomorrow

Does it matter really?

You slander me so freely

It’s not an accident

but a choice you make daily

I’m the broken branches

of a tree with rotten roots

I’m evil too boot and it’s not that cute

I’m just a mean person –

I’m the jerk you love to hate

I’m everything that grates

on your nerves, it’s too late

I can’t be changed.

It doesn’t matter much

All I am is out of touch

I fall behind on

every point of adult life.

And it’s fine

This misery is purely mine

And I’ll love it dearly

until the end of my time.

To the Goner

You were my roots that are now rotten
They turned to dust but are never forgotten
I remember how it feels, though I've never told
I remember the feeling of having a home

In my mind I have hidden a portrait of you
But I fear it's fading away from the truth
And all I'll become seems so minute and useless
I'm searching for any good reason to do this
To just keep on being whatever I'll be
Why keep on acting when you're not there to see?